Proof of Heart
by Kellcastor
Summary: When Oz accidentally confesses to Gil, Gil decides to fake his feelings rather than break the boy's heart. What he didn't expect was to actually fall for Oz. Shortly after this realization hits him, however, Oz catches on that he'd been lying and breaks up with him. Now it's up to Gilbert to convince Oz that his feelings for him are real and earn his trust again.


**Author Note:** A million thanks to my wonderful beta! I definitely wouldn't have been able to get this puppy going without her support and encouragement. Her Tumblr is livewhileyourbloodisboiling, and you should definitely check it out. Now, without further ado, enjoy~

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The sun glowed in a bright patchwork from above the leafy veil of the tree under which two Pandora members sat, leisurely enjoying the pleasant weather one late afternoon. Oz was completely engrossed in catching up on the _Holy Knight_ series, and with ten years worth of publications on his plate he had been cooped up indoors reading nonstop for the greater part of the past several days. But today the sky looked too blue and the grass too inviting for the young noble to resist the urge to take his book outside for the day. Gilbert, having no chores to busy himself with during their stay at the Rainsworth mansion, was dragged along. So the boy read, losing himself once more within the pages until he wasn't seeing pages at all, but colorful storylines dancing just beyond him. The blond was so involved, in fact, that he had nearly forgotten about his servant altogether until he let slip an audible yawn. Oz snapped his attention from the book, effectively pulled from his fantasy land. He caught Gilbert's eyes just in time to appreciate his slight, receding blush.

"Sorry," Oz apologized, rubbing the back of his neck to rid it of its stiffness. "You must be bored."

"Not at all!" Gilbert quickly responded. In truth, he had been perfectly content watching his master read. His face was so open while he read, entirely devoid of his usual walls. Gil didn't even need to see the words to know what was happening; the story was clearly written in the boy's expressions.

Oz laughed, assuming the immediate reply to be nothing more than reflexive politeness. "It's alright, Gil." His eyes brightened at a thought, and the boy scooted himself closer, slipping his book onto the other's lap. "Tell you what: How 'bout you read to me?"

"You mean... out loud?"

Oz rolled his eyes. "No Gil, using telepathy." He lightly knocked his friend's forehead with his own, giving him one of his 'Gil's so silly' smiles.

Gil cleared his throat awkwardly. "R-Right. Um... okay." Oz sat back against the tree in triumph as Gil picked up the book and fumbled to find where Oz left off. He eventually took pity on him and directed him to the bottom of page 362. From there, Gilbert began to read. He started out reserved and hesitant, but it was only a few pages until he too began to enjoy the story and grew comfortable and confident. And Oz was sucked back in, doubly enamored by the unique pleasure of hearing his favorite story in what Oz was beginning to decide may quite possibly be his favorite voice...

Soon pages turned into chapters and the sun took on an orange hue as it crept closer and closer to the treeline. Oz could hear the hoarseness creeping into Gil's voice at the extended use, but the man never complained. Even so, Oz couldn't help but feel a little guilty when his servant had to pause in his reading and take a moment to get his voice to cooperate again.

"You can stop if you want to," Oz said a bit reluctantly. "You're probably thirsty and I bet Alice is getting anxious about dinner by now."

Gil cleared his throat again, nodding slowly. The reluctance was mutual. Honestly, Gilbert didn't want to go back inside. He knew how rare times like these were, times when he could openly enjoy his master's company without interruption, distraction, or fear of impending failure. He wondered for a brief, desperate moment if he could manage to come up with a decently convincing reason to stay, but the idea of a hungry Alice hunting them down was enough to halt that train of thought.

He let out a great sigh. "Alright, then," he conceded, forcing himself up from the ground and onto his feet. "I suppose we should head back."

Oz yawned, stretching himself out across the grass in the spot Gil had just vacated. "But now I'm all sleepy," he complained, looking in no hurry to get up.

Gil felt the tiniest twitch of irritation at the boy's contradicting behavior. "If you keep laying there in the sun all day you're going to get cancer." Gil had his back to Oz, stretching, but he could practically see the indignant pout that no doubt crossed the boy's face.

"But Giiiil! Can you really blame me? The sun is so warm and Gil's voice was so relaxing~!"

Gil dropped his arms from their stretch, face darkening, and he was thankful he still had his back turned. "Th-That's irrelevant! If you're tired, you should go inside and lie down."

"Carry me, then."

Gil nearly choked. "C-Carry you?!" he sputtered, not sure he heard him right.

"Mhmm!" Oz confirmed brightly. "I want a piggy back ride."

"Seriously?" Gil replied, baffled by the childishness of his young master. It was so easy to forget sometimes, in the midst of all that was happening, just how young his master actually was. He had so much to face at such a small age...

"We used to do it all the time when we were kids," Oz reminded him, and his thoughts were reeled back in once more. "It should be no problem now that you're all grown up, _Raven_~"

Gilbert frowned at the jest, but nonetheless gave in. With a defeated sigh, he moved to stand just in front of the boy before hunkering down and allowing him to climb on his back. "Just hold on, okay? It'll be higher up than before."

"Stop worrying so much," Oz said, taking grip of his broad shoulders. "Gil may be taller now, but he's also stronger. I know you won't drop me!"

Deciding to ignore that comment, Gil gave Oz a moment to settle before carefully rising to his feet and setting out for the mansion. They had only traveled for a minute or two before Oz grew bored with Gil's overly cautious, painfully slow pace. He gave a huff of annoyance before pointing forward dramatically, shouting, "MUSH!"

Gil lurched forward, startled by the sudden exclamation. "I TOLD YOU TO HANG ON!" he cried in a panic as he attempted to regain his balance so as not to drop the boy. Oz laughed but wrapped his arms around the other's neck as told. Gil sighed in relief, having found his footing. "Why must you enjoy torturing me so?" he muttered lightly as he trudged onward once more.

"Because I love you~!"

Gilbert froze.

Oz immediately regretted his words. _'Stupid, stupid, stupid!' _he cursed himself. _'Why did you have to go and blurt that out?!' _He could feel the tension in Gil's muscles and as the silence dragged on Oz wanted nothing more than to crawl under a rock and cease to exist. Finally cracking under the pressure, he demanded quietly, "Put me down." Gil gave no indication of having registered his words, so he repeated the command with more volume. "I said put me down!" Unable to stand being so close under such awkward circumstances, Oz shoved against his captor's shoulders and wiggled in an attempt to free himself. He succeeded, only to land flat on his back on the ground.

"Oz!" Gil whipped around with a start, eyes wide as he knelt down to assess the damage.

"Ow..."

"Are you hurt?! Did you break anything?!"

"I'm fine," Oz assured, rubbing the back of his head with a grimace.

Gilbert noticeably relaxed. But with Oz's safety no longer at risk, the awkwardness of the situation came back full-force. His mind was racing. He tried to slow his thoughts, to make sense of _something_, but each one flew by too quickly for him to grasp. Through all the internal noise, he was still drawing a blank. He clasped a hand over his face, shaking his head. _'Come on, Gilbert,'_ he urged himself. _'Start with what you know. 1) Oz is my master. 2) Oz is my best friend. 3) Oz... loves me? Agh, but what does that _mean_?!' _He dropped his hand and finally looked at Oz, and there was no mistaking what it meant. He was sitting up, face red and downcast, unable to meet Gilbert's gaze. His hands picked at the grass nervously. Oz loved him. Oz was _in love_ with him. The conclusion hit him hard. He could feel the cold, numbing sensation of dread spread throughout his chest like creeping vines before rooting uncomfortably in his stomach. _Oz was in love with him_. Gil's heart dropped. Because he did love his master, more than anything this world or any other had to offer. He was his light and his reason for living, his best friend and his savior. Without Oz, Gilbert would be nothing but a lost soul, wandering without purpose or even so much as a memory to call his own. Without Oz, Gilbert would probably be dead. He owed Oz his life. He promised him forever, and he'd meant it. Until the day he died, Gilbert would serve his master to the furthest extent of his ability and beyond if necessary. But Oz wasn't the only person he made a vow to that day. He made a vow to himself, as well. A vow to give him all the love he could ever want or need, all the love his father refused him, so that the precious boy who gave Gilbert a purpose would never feel purposeless himself, would never feel worthless. And loving Oz was so easy. It was almost impossible not love that smile-his real smile, the one that was so beautiful and open that it felt like a gift to witness—and his laugh, the gentleness with which he interacted with his sister, his playful nature, his innocence... It was unquestionable that Gil loved the boy. But _in love_ with him? He would be lying if he said the thought never crossed his mind. His motives were questioned time after time throughout those ten years Gilbert fought to get his master back from the Abyss. But the possibility was simply out of the question. Oz was his _master_, and noble standing aside, Gilbert was his _servant_. Not to mention the fact that they were both male and-

"You must hate me now." Oz fidgeted anxiously, plucking the ground bare in front of him to avoid plucking his own hair out instead. He couldn't believe how big he'd fucked up this time, and was terrified by the possibility that he had just ruined everything they had. _'Gil is probably repulsed by me...' _he thought miserably. His eyes stung and he could feel the telltale lump growing in his throat as he fought back tears. _'Why am I such an idiot?'_

"God, Oz, no!" He was freaking out. _'How could Oz think...?' _Forcing himself to calm down, he placed a hand on Oz's cheek and gently tilted his head up. "Hey, look at me," he requested firmly. Oz did, and Gilbert was sucker punched by the raw defeat and self-loathing so plainly written on his face. "Oz," he started, his voice softening, "I could _never_ hate you, or even dislike you, or be anything but in awe by you because-" Gilbert's words caught in his throat. Oz was looking at him with wide, teary eyes that put the mid-April grass to shame. And in them was _hope_, hope so fragile yet so bright and Gilbert knew. He would not be the one to douse that light. He couldn't. Oz had nearly lost himself after his father's rejection. If Gil rejected him now... it would break him. So he put on a smile and plowed onward. "Because... I love you, too, Oz."

Oz let out what could have been either a laugh or a sob and lunged forward, wrapping his arms around his friend and burying his face in his torso. "Gil..."

Gil encircled the boy with his free arm and moved his other to place a hand on his golden head, stroking his hair softly with his thumb.

He'd played this game before countless times to fulfill his duties as a Nightray. He was confident in his ability to lie flawlessly, and was disgusted with himself for it. But this time was different. This was Oz. Oz, who knew him better than anyone save himself. This was far from a game, as that would mean he was only playing with the boy and that was something Gil simply couldn't swallow. No. This was real, and he would do whatever it took to convince Oz of that.

Gilbert tightened his arms around the blond in a hug, not sure if he was trying to reassure Oz or himself.

"Hey now," Oz chided playfully, "don't you start getting all sappy on me, you hear?"

"Ah! S-Sorry!"

Oz pulled away from the raven, laughing. "Come on Gil," he said, grabbing his servant by the arm and pulling him to his feet—though Gilbert did most of the work himself. "Let's find Alice before she starts harassing the poor cooks."

Gil allowed Oz to lead him back to the Rainsworth estate in a daze. He was thankful for Oz's hand on his wrist, because with his luck he'd otherwise end up walking right into a tree. He couldn't stop staring at the younger's face, and it may have only been a result of the setting sun, but Gil swore Oz's smile was the brightest he'd ever seen.


End file.
